


voices.

by rannas



Category: Persona 5
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, M/M, Pre-Relationship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-11
Updated: 2017-06-11
Packaged: 2018-11-12 23:09:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,772
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11172039
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rannas/pseuds/rannas
Summary: Madarame had been taken down, but his presence still lingered, making sleep difficult. But the reminder he was longer alone was enough comfort for Yusuke to make it through the night.





	voices.

**Author's Note:**

> Set after beating the second palace. Inspired by Yusuke’s Memento’s banter where he mentions that says he “heard voices like this every night at Madarame's.”

The collapse of that foul excuse for a museum had left no impact on the physical world. Everything he knew of that world had told him that much but he still almost expected the atelier to be gone or changed in someway. But everything remained the same. The dusty corners and dim lighting remained completely the same. The empty rooms of the former pupils remained as they had been left. Before the emptiness had gone unnoticed, but now as he lay trying to sleep it felt as it was wrapping itself around him in tiny tendrils, slowly suffocating him. At night, it used to be as if there were voices in the distance. Too quiet for him to discern what they were saying. Their presence had initially been a source of unease but at least they had drowned out his own thoughts. Now his own thoughts were deafening, echoing through his head in an endless refrain making it impossible for him to drift off to sleep.

All they could do was wait… He repeated those words in his head, the mantra that would get him through the end of the exhibit. _All he could do was wait…_

Mindlessly he begins going through his phone to distract himself. His contact list was short as always but he sees the names of his three new companions, two of which he added today. Did their presence indicate they were now friends? He had never really had friends. The other pupils were older and treated him more like a kid brother than anything else. Yet still they had remained distant. Knowing what Madarame was hiding from his that fact did not seem like a coincidence. They were likely distant because they were ordered to be (keeping him seperate would only ensure he would never discover Madarame's greatest secret). At school his classmates kept their distance as well, and he had heard all too many whispers about how he must think he was so much better being a pupil of a high profile artist. Mere jealousy, Madarame had told him, and he had blocked it from his mind not allowing it to bother him.

Being alone had never been a concern he was allowed to dwell on. Sensei had always told him that the best artists operated that way and if he truly wanted to be great someday he couldn’t be held down by the needs of others. Fool that he was, he believed it.

Takamaki, Sakamoto, Kurusu… they had forced their way in his life so abruptly. Their presence filling some void he never knew he had, something he never knew he had longed for. The pursuit of art had been all he had needed for so long. And yet just looking at their names made him feel a little bit lighter and the emptiness of the atelier a little less oppressive.

His thumb lingers on Kurusu’s name. What a wonder he was. Without him they would have never taken down Madarame. The way he moved in battle, effortlessly switching between masks, leading them in the wild yet organized dance of combat. And that devilish smirk every time they took down a lesser shadow, that had imprinted itself so easily he found himself sketching that same look every day after they left the Metaverse. And yet the real wonder wasn’t his prowess in battle, it was the calm and effortless way he held them all together.

He would have been blind not to see the trust that Sakamoto and Takamaki had in him. The way they looked to him at every move. How they would lean on him physically as well, resting their arms across him as they searched through chests and peered around corners. A familiarity with one another that mesmerized him. Oddly, he found himself falling into the same patterns in no time at all. There was something calming in those dark eyes, an intensity that drew him in like a moth to a flame. And a feeling that just being around a presence like that would lead to something great, a feeling that he would follow him anywhere.

Lost in his own thoughts, his thumb dips and presses down on the screen on top of Kurusu’s contact information. Immediately, he hears ringing and slight panic runs through him, but not enough to just hang up, something in him was so desperate to hear something beyond his own thoughts, even if it was just the recording of a voicemail message. As soon as he hears the distinct click of the call being picked up, he breathes out an apology, “Kurusu-- I am sorry it is far too late I should not have called you.”

“It’s fine, are you okay?” Yusuke could hear the exhaustion in his tone which gave him a pang of guilt. That was overshadowed by some other feeling overcoming him at hearing the sound of the worry in his voice.

“Ah yes.. of course. It is just very quiet here.” Yusuke whispers, even though he feels foolish knowing there is no one to overhear him.

“He’s not there right?” There was an edge in his tone lingering on the word ‘he’ that made it all too clear who he was referring to.

“Oh no, he has a room near the exhibition.” Yusuke doesn’t mention his name either, his presence was oppressive enough in this place without saying his name out loud.

“Good.” He could hear the same cold intensity in that one word that Joker had used when facing Madarame, which was oddly comforting. They fell into silence for a bit and Yusuke listened to the sound of the others breathing, the rhythm slowly calming him and untangling his anxious thoughts.

“I had never noticed just quite how empty it was.” The words tumbled out of him, surprising himself by sharing something he had barely admitted to himself.

“You’ve been there by yourself for a while haven’t you?” Was he just imagining the sadness in Kurusu’s voice or was it a mere projection of his own melancholic mood?

“That is true… before it was almost as if I could hear voices in the distance. It’s quiet now.”He had never admitted that to anyone. His oddness was already easily ridiculed, telling others about phantom voices would only further cement his identity as an eccentric. But somehow, even without Kurusu’s physical presence it felt so easy to speak his mind, to let those vulnerable thoughts flow out into the open unhindered. ”I guess it never felt lonely before tonight.”

“Yusuke…” Hearing his name through the phone like that sends a shudder through him akin to the one he feels every time Goemon unleashes his ice magic. Kurusu had never used his first name before. It was oddly familiar for someone he had only known for such a short time, but intimate and comforting all the same.

“I … am not sure why I called you.” It would be easier to attribute it to some foolish accident, a slip of a finger, but Yusuke felt there had to be something deliberate in his mistake. After all, why else would he have had his phone out in the first place.

“I don’t mind.” He could not help but wonder could a voice that commanded shadows to back down in a way that sent shivers down his spine could also have such a softness to it. A softness that commanded a decidedly different sensation dancing through his chest.

“Are you sure? I would not want to interrupt your sleep just because I myself can not sleep.” Yusuke can hear the neediness in his voice, it’s unfamiliar from the guarded independence he normally attempted. Madarame would not stand for his weakness, as a youth he had been chastised for it. An artist does not act like a selfish child. Yusuke had always concealed his weaknesses, forcing himself to act like an adult, to forsake his own selfish desires. But for once, it felt nice to be needy.

“Just don’t hang up.... I’ll stay on until you fall asleep.” It was softer spoken than his commands as Joker, but it was a command all the same. A command he did not question, he was their leader after all. And that feeling of trust he felt towards Kurusu was somehow already stronger than the lingering presence of his mentor.

“Very well then.” Yusuke set the phone by his ear and focused all of his attention on the breathing he could hear through the phone, lingering on the sense of connection, on the fact that no matter how empty this cursed shack that once was home, there was someone out there who understood. And that was enough. Enough to ease the tension wrapping around every limb and allowing him to finally drift off into a peaceful sleep where his only dreams consisted of a dark haired boys smile.

\-------

In another part of Tokyo, another boy lay gripping his phone by his head staring at the ceiling. A strange feeling coursing through him. One that he had been feeling off and on since a boy chased Ann down in the subway. At first just a flash of appreciation, for how nice that dark hair framed his pale and graceful features. But then it grew as he watched that boy fight back and show his inner strength. And now laying in bed he could feel it grow still as he heard soft breaths through the phone. Morgana had already admonished him for taking calls so late and had retreated to the couch. So all he was left with was the phone and the heartbreaking image of a lonely boy sleeping, too far for him to reach out and comfort. The image of his heartbroken face when as he found the truth about his mother stuck on Akira’s mind until he finally drifted off to sleep.

When he woke there was silence and it was clear the call had ended. Although a quick check of his call long confirmed it had lasted through the night. He did however have a message notification blinking on his screen instead.

 **Kitagawa Yusuke** : Thank you.

He stared at the message for a while, biting his lip and wishing there was someway to tell the boy on the other side of the screen that it was going to be okay and that he didn’t have to be lonely anymore. It was like the time he had attempted to comfort Ann about Kamoshida soon after meeting her, once again he felt at a loss and completely speechless. None of the words running through his head seemed to be enough.

**Author's Note:**

> I know I still have a fic to finish (which I will be doing soon) but on a long drive I ended up writing this. It’s always seemed sad to me that Yusuke had to go back and live with Madarame while they waited for him to confess. Also, why are summaries so difficult to write?


End file.
